It is fitting that the most popular morning radio talk show for the entirety of the Bush Cartel's reign of terror and destruction is Howard Stern, out of N.Y.C.
Downright Biblical.
Especially since he repeatedly advocates that the only solution for Peace in the Middle East is to allow Israel to annihilate every neighbor that contests their expansion through nuclear war, turning their lands into one huge parking lot.
I was in elementary school when i began listening to his show. It was pure genius.
To summarize:
He was a N.Y.C. local who was raised in the traditions of Judaism, Rock and Roll, and Television. His radio pedigree began with his father, who had spent decades in the recording studios of the Big Apple, allowing Howard access to that world from birth.
He was agnostic, irreverent, horny, brave and disgusting. His show revealed a world of people and jokes that had never seen public exposure. He had inhaled, and snorted, and loved quaaludes. When Nancy Reagan was telling us to "JUST SAY NO!" (while popping her pills), Howard had already said yes. He did not advocate drug abuse, but was not afraid to discuss and acknowledge it.
He was married and monogamous. He was raising children that continued his ancestors' Jewish traditions. His wife was an angel.
By declaring his spiritual doubts live every morning, by renouncing his ancestral faith to all of the listeners, he was (and is) a spiritual warrior.
Kings cannot ascend thrones without allies. His were priceless.
1~ His Queen, Robin Ophelia Quivers. A smart, accepting, challenging, proud, patriotic, sexy and single black woman. As a Christian, her tolerance of Howard's statements and antics passively enabled the God-fearing public to enter his show's dysfunctional universe.
2~ His General, the brilliant and subversive maestro of the subconscious... Fred Norris. He was the show's bard, using any sound to sculpt the show's mood and direction.
3~ His Court Jester, the Jewish pothead known as Jackie the Jokeman. He was also the resident elder on the show.
4~ His Governor, Baba Booey... whom he openly ridiculed and occasionally despised (but allowed to produce the show)... the sycophantic, good-hearted Gary Dell'Abate.
5~ His Town Cryer, the offensive but lovable Stuttering John.
The King of All Media sat on his throne first as a hero of his own design, Fartman. Using his mastery of the N.Y.C. English language and slang, he wrapped himself in the American flag and called the Iranian Embassy. The U.S. military had just killed 290 innocent civilians when they shot down an Iranian passenger jet.
As Fartman, Howard told the man at the embassy that he sided with America on that horrible situation, because Iran had killed 9 hostages, and then he delivered his intended message, which was a bunch of farts.
Those farts propelled him to his ascendancy. Now he cuts deals for half a Billion dollars and he holds the entire satellite radio industry in the palm of his hand.
He doesn't call embassies anymore... but his colleagues are enlisted by the U.S. Military to go on trips to Afghanistan and support our troops.
His shows now focus on finding media references to himself and dissecting them. Or exploring his fear of direct physical contact with the natural world and the people within it. Or defending the words that fly out of his mouth when they make waves that he can see.
Like David Letterman, his humor grows more bitter and self-involved day by day.
Who or what can usurp his rule?
America continues to tune in, waiting to see.
